A relationship can fail without conscious intent unless you understand the two major forces underlying resentment and alienation. Come learn how one shift in perception and three simple techniques can create harmony and happiness at home and work. This workshop will include lecture, video, practical handouts, experiential exercise and discussion.
In this workshop, we will explore the unique emotional development of boys and men, the different ways men and women respond to psychotherapy, and the special psychological challenges men face, including their preoccupation with money, power, and competition, as well as their use of work, anger, isolation, substance abuse and sexuality to mask troubling symptoms like depression. Attendees will learn how to engage even the most therapy-resistant men through a highly active approach that normalizes, rather than pathologizes, their feelings, attitudes, and behavior. Videotapes examples of actual sessions will be used to understand how to work with men in therapy.
It is said that men are afraid of intimacy. Love-avoidant men don't know what intimacy is; what they fear is subjugation - being drained, used, entrapped. These men most often have histories of enmeshment with either one or both parents. That enmeshment can be positive (e.g. the caretaker} or negative (e.g. the scapegoat), but it always leaves the person with both shame and grandiosity.
Why has depression been seen as a “woman’s disease”? Depression is not unwomanly, but many feel it as unmanly—setting up what Real calls, “compound depression.” Men, he says, feel ashamed of feeling ashamed, depressed about being depressed,” causing them to hide it, and causing those around them—even medical professionals—to shy away from confronting the condition. Even more important, however, is the fact that many men express depression differently than women. Real will speak of “covert depression” which lies at the core of many of men’s typical “bad behaviors.” like drinking, workaholism, withdrawal, and anger.
At no other time in history have men been so awash in mixed cultural messages and in such a state of transition, confusion, reactivity, and trouble. Despite being basically good hearted, many men continue to make a hash of their relationships. We therapists can help, but not before rethinking some of the sacred cows of therapeutic practice. Men need action and leadership from us, challenging them while still loving the little boy inside them and offering guidance and tools to their inner grown-up.
EP17 Great Debates 11 - Masculine/Feminine: Then and Now - Esther Perel, MA, LMFT and Marilyn Yalom, PhD
Tennyson, in a nineteenth-century poem, expressed the firm belief in the difference between men and women.
Man for the field and woman for the heart:
Man for the sword and for the needle she:
Man with the head and woman with the heart:
Man to command and woman to obey.
During the twentieth century, this doctrine of separate spheres was steadily eroded so that by now, in the Western world, woman are expected to use their brains as well as their hearts and men are encouraged to assume some of the roles previously allotted exclusively to women. This dialogue between Esther Perel and Marilyn Yalom will explore the challenges that men and women now face in assuming traits and roles of the opposite gender. Are we edging towards a more androgynous definition of gender and a multiplicity of gender identities? What are the lingering gaps in gender inequality? Is there a “crisis of mascu
The prominence of women as friends would have surprised people living in the distant past and would still surprise people in certain parts of the world, where only male friendship is prized. Yet, if you ask Americans today whether men or women have more friends, the answer is likely to be women. I shall examine the ingredients that seem basic to women’s friendships and suggest ways in which friendships between women (and between women and men) may be the saving grace in our present lives. I shall also examine the concept of friendship more generally as it has been understood in the western tradition since Aristotle. What are the benefits of friendship? Is it possible to live well without friends? What can women learn from male friendships and men learn from female friendships?
The enormous changes brought about in the last 25 years by the women's movement and the sex role revolution have opened new possibilities and problems-sources of conflict and new strengths for women, men and families. There is a challenge now for psychotherapists to break through their own remnant stereotypes of feminine mystique, masculine mystique, and obsolete assumptions about family so that they may distinguish between personal and political pathology and help evolving women, men and families find and use more consciously their new strengths and confront real problems realistically.
Learn Ericksonian principals for encouraging men to participate and enjoy psychotherapy.
Utilize strategies for dealing with their own biases regarding difficult men.
Expand definitions of healthy masculinity.