Credit Available - See Credits tab below.
Total Credits: 1.5 including 1.5 A.P.A.
Description:
Relational Life Therapy (RLT) produces deep, lasting change in couples quickly by breaking many cherished couple’s therapy rules. We take sides, for example. Not all problems are fifty-fifty. We judiciously self-disclose. We’re in it with you. We work with trauma in each partner, doing deep individual work in the presence of one another. We pay close attention to gender – the unique characteristics of men and women in our culture and how those differences collide. We work with issues of both shame and also of grandiosity. We explicitly address power imbalances, and rebalance them.
Through lecture, demonstration, and video excerpts of real sessions, workshop participants will learn how to join through the truth, the art of holding the mirror up to our clients in ways that not only leave them feeling you are on their side, but that you are actively rooting for them.
Educational Objectives:
*Sessions may be edited for content and to preserve confidentiality*
Outline:
Fundamentals of Relational Life Therapy (RLT) Workshop Introduction
Workshop held at the 2019 Milton H. Erickson Foundation Couples Conference in Manhattan Beach.
Speaker 9 (Terry Real) emphasizes the relational nature of therapy and invites audience questions.
Goal of first session is securing a second—building connection is key.
Acknowledges potential mistakes and the need for humility in clinical judgment.
Relational Therapy Techniques and Client Interaction
"Sustaining": therapists pause and let clients respond naturally.
Importance of therapist detachment from outcome.
Live sessions preferred for their dynamic energy and transparency.
Gender and Confrontational Style in Therapy
Women can be just as confrontational and effective in RLT.
Encourages women to claim their authority despite cultural challenges.
Acceptance and warmth must accompany confrontation for it to be effective.
The Art of Joining and Healthy Self-Esteem
“Joining through the truth”: blend of blunt honesty and love.
Therapists must have healthy self-esteem to deliver hard truths effectively.
Therapists should strive for clarity, evenness, and genuine connection.
Functional Adult, Wounded Child, and Adaptive Child
Psyche divided into three parts: functional adult, wounded child, and adaptive child.
Adaptive child forms through modeled behaviors and defense.
Therapy helps grow the functional adult to guide behavior and relationships.
Inner Child Work and Relational Trauma Healing
Reparenting involves nurturing, guiding, and setting limits for the inner child.
Therapy often uses couples work to facilitate relational healing.
Video example shown of working with a grandiose woman and her partner.
Challenges and Contraindications in Therapy
RLT can apply to parent-child relationships using psychodrama.
Couples work must wait if psychiatric issues or substance abuse are untreated.
Preconditions: safety, stability, and basic emotional regulation.
Psychoeducation and Experiential Work
Balance psychoeducation with experiential methods—don’t over-intellectualize.
To identify inner child, ask clients what age they feel when triggered.
Handling Client Reactions and Using Therapist Feelings
Clients with memory blocks should proceed slowly; safety first.
Observing partners should not be managed—let them sit with their own emotions.
Multi-Generational Trauma and Psychodrama Techniques
Emotions can be carried across generations (“carried feelings”).
Healing often requires addressing unresolved trauma in the family lineage.
Therapist’s emotional responses are diagnostic tools—use strategically.
Core Negative Images and Relational Dynamics
Core negative images shape how partners perceive and react to each other.
Understanding these images improves empathy, boundaries, and communication.
Humor used to ease tension while exploring deep emotional patterns.
1.5 credits available.
The Milton H. Erickson Foundation, Inc. is approved by the American Psychological Association to sponsor continuing education for psychologists. The Milton H. Erickson Foundation, Inc. maintains responsibility for this program and its content.
THE MILTON H. ERICKSON FOUNDATION Policy on Disclosure
The Milton H. Erickson Foundation is proud of the conferences and other
educational opportunities it sponsors, taking care that the conduct of
these activities conforms to the standards and principles of behavioral
and medical sciences, thus ensuring balance, independence, objectivity
and scientific rigor in all individually sponsored or jointly sponsored educational
activities.
All faculty members participating in a sponsored activity, and those who
review and therefore are in control of content, are requested to disclose
any relevant financial relationship prior to the CME activity, including but
not limited to specific commercial interests, financial remuneration received
by faculty member or spouse, and what role or activity was performed
for this remuneration. If a conflict of interest exists as a result of
a financial relationship it will be resolved prior to the activity. A faculty
member will not be allowed to present if the conflict is not or cannot be
resolved.
Terry Real - High Impact Couples Therapy (1.3 MB) | Available after Purchase |
Terry Real - Joining Through the Truth (1 MB) | Available after Purchase |
Terry Real - Long Shadow (2.3 MB) | Available after Purchase |
Terry Real, LICSW, is a nationally recognized family therapist, author, and teacher. He is particularly known for his groundbreaking work on men and male psychology as well as his work on gender and couples; he has been in private practice for over twenty-five years. Terry has appeared often as the relationship expert for Good Morning America and ABC News. His work has been featured in numerous academic articles as well as media venues such as Oprah, 20/20, The Today Show, CNN, The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, Psychology Today and many others.