EP17 Conversation Hour 06 - Cloe Madanes, LIC, HDL

Introduction and Format

• Cloe Madanes is introduced for her contributions to psychotherapy.

• Invites audience questions to guide discussion.

Approach to Difficult Clients

• Experienced in treating sex offenders and abuse victims.

• Developed a 15-step family therapy method emphasizing spirituality and compassion.

• Process includes family involvement, discussing the offense, and expressing remorse.

Treatment Success and Adaptations

• Method has a 98% success rate with juvenile offenders.

• Adaptable for adult offenders and non-family abuse cases.

• Highlights importance of addressing intergenerational violence (influenced by Mary Bowen).

Strategies for Common Issues

• “Take Three Issues” for overwhelmed parents: focus only on top 3 concerns.

• “Executive Meetings” for couples: scheduled weekly discussions outside the home.

• Humorously suggests paradoxical blocking of communication to reduce nagging.

On Multi-Therapist Cases

• Recommends one therapist per family for consistency.

• Warns against separate therapy for different family members with different clinicians.

Managing Time-Pressured Sessions

• For demanding clients, schedule intense cases last or plan multiple-day intensives.

• Offers personal phone calls in her online training for deeper support.

Infidelity in Couples Therapy

• Infidelity isn’t one-sided; it can lead to a stronger relationship.

• Shift focus to creating a dream marriage rather than rehashing betrayal.

• References Esther Perel’s view of infidelity as a growth opportunity.

Being a Female Leader in the Field

• Didn’t set out to be a trailblazer—focused on doing good work.

• Values professionalism, equal treatment for students, and traditional roles if chosen.

Therapy Outside the Office

• Encourages walking sessions, outdoor activities, and visual interventions.

• Collaborates with Tony Robbins on immersive strategies.

• Advises partnering with schools and community orgs for impoverished families.

Handling Denial in Adult Offenders

• Broaden the unit: involve family/professionals who can offer evidence.

• Be flexible and revise the strategy if new information arises.

• Shares example of needing to shift approach after discovering a false accusation.

Helping Passive Parents

• Teach passive parents to move from “understanding” to “protective.”

• Reinforce authority and boundaries—kids need to feel contained and guided.

• Reframe parenting as an act of love through structure and clarity.