CC22 Workshop 06 - Therapeutic Use of Containers - Stan Tatkin, PsyD

Couple therapists must be able to organize each session in such a way that allows for measuring progress in their treatment plan. One such way is to think of placing the couple and therapist in discreet “containers” or exercises that stress the couple. These exercises, tasks, or games allow the therapist to test and retest hypotheses, test a particular capacity, or otherwise allow the therapist to view couple performance in real time. These containers include a task, timing, and possible roles casted by the therapist and may include a role the therapist must also play. An example might be a psychodrama whereby partners must replay a recent event – step by step – as the therapist, as investigator, gets the facts. Or another container might involve a deal breaker issue whereby partners are required to persuade each other out of a deal breaker while the therapist plays the role of mediating only the manner in which partners argue their points.

Learning Objectives:

1. To be able to accurately describe the meaning and purpose of containers in couple therapy.

2. To be able to apply the use of containers for assessment and intervention purposes.

3. To be able to identify implicit and explicit behavioral leakages through partner somatic reactions while under stress.

Outline:

Therapeutic Containers: Purpose and Structure

• Containers serve as therapeutic frames that orient both therapist and couple toward secure functioning.

• The frame includes therapist role, alliance, and treatment rules—focused on the relationship, not individuals.

• Secure functioning is based on mutual power, parity, interdependence, and shared goals.

Secure Functioning and Shared Governance

• Emphasizes shared purpose, vision, and decision-making (e.g., like cop partners or military teams).

• Relationship viewed as an abstraction requiring mutual governance and support.

• Transparency, fairness, and managing cultural differences are central to healthy relationship dynamics.

Stress as a Diagnostic Tool

• Stress reveals underlying issues and developmental delays in the couple.

• Therapists use “containers” (e.g., bending metal, declarations) to apply pressure and observe behavior in real time.

• Observing reactions under stress provides rich diagnostic information.

Key Therapeutic Containers

• Bending Metal: Pushes partners with strong statements to expose true feelings.

• Declarations: Phrases like “I want a divorce” or “I’m all in” used to trigger and assess emotional response.

• Corralling Questions: Force clarity and accountability under pressure.

• Exercises must be playful but provoke real reactions.

Observational Tools

• Digital video frame analysis helps track micro-expressions, body movement, and voice cues.

• Playback used to corroborate reactions and increase client collaboration.

Adapting to Telehealth

• Online therapy requires strong internet, clear lighting, and camera angles.

• Tools like staged “bedroom scenes” or digital playback help replicate in-person techniques.

Handling Resistance

• Full permission required before active role-plays.

• Resistance explored as potential acting out; therapist must address concerns and build trust.

• Reluctance often signals deeper relational issues.

Therapeutic Alliance and Agreement

• A clear therapeutic alliance is essential before any interventions.

• Structure mirrors the couple’s dynamic—without agreement, no progress.

• Therapists use this structure to model fairness and teamwork.

Beckoning Exercise

• Real-time nonverbal interaction used to assess and demonstrate connection.

• Acts as a diagnostic “X-ray” revealing attachment behaviors.

• Playback allows clients to validate therapist observations.

Assessment as Intervention

• Every container is both diagnostic and therapeutic.

• Rigorous, detailed assessment prevents superficial treatment.

• First step is always deep investigation of the actual problem.

Staging and Psychodrama Techniques

• Staged scenarios (e.g., morning routines, car rides) simulate real-life tensions.

• Therapist manipulates positions and energy levels to reveal interaction patterns.

• Example: pairing “wave” (clinging) with “island” (avoidant) to surface proximity challenges.

Attachment and Communication

• Measures proximity-seeking and contact maintenance behaviors.

• Helps couples express needs clearly and understand each other’s patterns.

• Focus is on developing empathy and improved regulation.

Final Reflections

• Containers are narrative frameworks for both assessment and healing.

• Secure functioning is a two-person system requiring structure, direction, and mutual care.

• Therapy aims to create psychological guardrails for relational stability and resilience.